TWO FOR TUESDAY - FAIL

It took me a few weeks, but I realized that I never actually added anything to my "Two for Tuesday" features titles that would give anyone searching the archives a clue as to what they might be two things about.  I didn't follow it up on the And A Third for Thursdays either.  

I do however realize that nobody really gives a shit - since nobody ever looks into the archives.  After all what good is old Bone news.  Not that I write anything that can be considered news, or newsworthy for that matter - but my drivel can be considered timeless - so just in case some surviving future generation stumbles upon the dusty back catalog of this blabber, I figured I'd help them out by adding something to the title that indicates what I'm offering within my extraordinarily lazy Tuesday and Thursday throwaway posts.

Look at that - there's about twenty seconds you'll never get back.

Some better things you might have been able to do with those twenty seconds.

* Sneezed three or four times

* Brushed your gerbil

* Consumed a tootsie roll

* Scrolled down to find other adgitize buttons to click through without once stopping and wondering why the fuck my dumb ass bonehead shows up pasted on all sorts of other peoples bodies.

* Had an in-depth discussion with Abe Vigoda (he played TV's "Fish") about all of the positive accomplishments of the George W. Bush presidency. 

* Flossed

Yup, thus far this post is a fail - or, as my daughter, the young Junior Miss Giddy might say, an Epic Fail.  Cracks me up every time she uses the phrase.  It's been popular with the college age set for a few years, and can pretty much be used to describe anything that doesn't quite work out the way it was planned.  Used in the proper context, the stark bluntness of the catch phrase can also incite laughter at the most inopportune time.

Junior Miss had come by this past Sunday - she usually comes by the house on Fridays to do her laundry, but had to come on Sunday because she had so many different errands to run on Friday, plus a school project, then work, she couldn't grab the time.  It's all good for us - she's living at college but still only thirty minutes away, so we get to see (and feed) her weekly during the semester.  Anyway, we asked her about her hectic Friday and she proceeded to point out all of the things that went wrong for her.  We felt bad of course, until she concluded her story with two little words that wrapped up the entire episode..."epic fail".

Although she was using the descriptive to emphasize her frustration, I couldn't help but chuckle a little bit to myself.  Like I said, just something about the phrase that strikes me as humorous, sort of like other cute phrases such as "Go fuck yourself" and "Go pound sand in your ass".

Junior Miss wasn't pleased, but she understood.  One of my favorite sites to visit and waste some time is Fail Blog - all sorts of funny pictures and videos of things not turning out how they were intended.  The Fail Blog channel on You Tube is one of that sites most popular.  It's a great theory - short clips of people doing some pretty stupid things - sort of the next, ruder generation of America's Funniest Home Videos.

Like I said, it's Tuesday - so here's two of my favorites.  Check back again on Thursday for a third.  

I've watched each of them multiple times - and I laugh every time.  Yup a stoned cop and Jesus falling off the cross - pardon me for not exhibiting political correctness - guess I'm an epic fail when it comes to that sort of quality.